My non-celebrity ipod playlist

1. Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away) - The Deftones Too personal, thanks Chino.
2. Don't Follow - Alice in Chains Great to play when depressed.
3. Heroine Girl - Everclear Makes me want to throw glass bottles.
4. Chemistry - Jawbreaker It captures my high school dayz.
5. My My My (StoneBridge Remix) - Armand Van Helden When I feel like dancing.
6. The Rain Falls and the Sky Shudders - Moby Gives me goosebumps.
7. Get Fly - Atmosphere Best shit I've heard in the last couple of years.
8. No Vaseline - Ice Cube The best diss song on wax.
9. Shook Ones Pt.II - Mobb Deep Damn I wish I was a gangsta.
10. Got to Give It Up - Marvin Gaye If your body doesn't have rhythm leave the floor!
11. Up All Night - Unwritten Law My 20's.
12. Just Like Heaven - The Cure Reminds me when I first met the Wifey.
13. Hand Springs - The White Stripes A song with a story is a novel idea.
14. The Symphony - Big Daddy Kane, Craig G, Kool G. Rap, Marley Marl & Masta Ace Dope.
15. Radio - Rancid "Never knew what a good time was till' I had a good time with you"
16. Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap - AC/DC My mom actually burned this record at church.

I look like shit in a wife-beater

Disclaimer: I know that "wife-beater" is inappropriate and my apologies go out to the offended, but if it makes you feel better, my wifey calls them "man-beaters".

Anyway, I've decided to start using my Chuck Norris home gym contraption and make my man boobs disappear. I'm turning 33 this spring & I feel like such a slob. I think I'm on the verge of a pre-midlife crisis. Fuck.

I'm popping my cherry

Feb. nine, 200Se7eN: My first ever blog

It's Friday & i called in sick to my shadowy government job because my son is sick. I'm sure a few hours from now I'll be kicking his ass in Halo 2, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make him feel better. Anyway, and this is gonna sound bad, but I'm sorta happy he was violently puking this morning, he's going to be just fine so I'm still in the running for Father of the Year again so no worries there, but this gives me a chance to take care of him in a motherly way, the kid is 14 now and can fend for himself, I just need to leave him money on the nightstand like a hooker. I am the king of run-on sentences. Last week he used my credit card and ordered pizza on line. How fucking great is that? I am a huge fan of initiative and credit card fraud by the way. And any chance to show my boy that I care about him is the shit.

So last night I DJ'd Music Bingo at the Chatterbox aka the box, at the Highland Park location. If you've never Music Bingo'd, instead of calling out O-69 or B-1, I play random songs, and you just have to match clues i.e. song titles, artist names, misc. trivia associated with each song and you win a prize. Some of the prizes are decent but I think my daughter has won better shit playing ski ball @ Chucky Cheese it's free and I get paid an obscene amount of money to run it. I do this Weds. @ the Box in Mpls. and again on Thurs. @ Highland Park. Oh I had a point in all of this, I said I DJ'd Music Bingo and quite honestly I don't really DJ for this gig I mainly just pop in a CD and and press play. "It's so easy a caveman can do it". My wife switched us to Geico and we actually save money on car insurance. Anyway, I can really DJ when afforded the opportunity but @ the Box it just press play. You should come out and play sometime. I'm nice.

I prefer the Mpls. Box vs. Highland Park even though it's 2 blks. from my house. Highland Park has too many "preppies" & old fucks. Now Mpls. that's the place to be. It's not the limited space I have to work in, or the uneven sound system, or the shitty parking, or the fact that I have to deal with the traffic lights and lightrail traffic on Hwy. 55, it's the employees of The Box & most importantly the people that come in that make it so enjoyable. I wish I could come in & play music bingo one night with the little people (just kidding) I've never met a more kick ass group of people in a long while than that of the "regulars" who play each Weds. It's weird because I just started learning alot of their names recently and I've had numerous conversations with all of them regarding my hot wife, my kids, my daughter's Shitzu, pop culture, blood for oil, and the meaning of life etc. Speaking of my daughter's Shitzu, Little Miss Cookie just pooped right in front of me. Gotta go.